I know you want me to get better quick, but .......

Today is the life celebration for my Dr. who passed away on 12/21 from Lyme related heart issues. He taught me how to live a better life being very ill.There are various reasons I've felt alone and estranged with my Lyme. People do not understand, and think I'm lazy or being mean. I have stage 4 Lyme and it has reached my brain. There are times I can't talk right, or form certain words. I say the wrong thing. I get depressed and sad for no reason.. I have so many physical problems, I get paranoid that people get sick of listening to me or think I'm lying.  My short term memory is shot. Sometimes I hear voices and see things or I don't know who you are for a minute.I know it isn't real, but nonetheless terrifying.  That's scary and being a mental health therapist, I will continue to help others afflicted as well. I lost my marriage and my new relationship because of my disease. My days revolve around my medications and my doctor appointments. There are days I can't leave the house because I'm in so much pain, but through it all, I have to accept that and keep pushing forward.